Im so scared Im going to forget her. Then I guess theres no rush! And then mom said, Lets clean up. And she made us sing that song she always loved. TELL MY STORYY! (a beat.) However, we have dozens of other monologues that you can read. CHARLES: I just have to get the chalk. Adam, we need a door. I asked you to send me a sign. The man next to me is the one I want. She needs somebody to help her get past all this. Delia! And now this is what you get. After Adam and Barbara realized that Lydia wasn't like the rest of her family, they didn't want Betelgeuse to scare her anymore. One of the reasons Beetlejuice's Lydia is an icon is her style. I dont know what I did. DELIA: Black reminds me of a funeral! MAXINE: OH STOP! Thank God you didn't die in Italy.". But when he turns it on, what if your mom shows up instead? BEETLEJUICE: Nice moves Lydia! Unless, are you horribly disfigured? CHARLES: Youre right. A toast to my father and his all important business! Up the stairs! What if Lydia walks in? See you in hell, AGH, Im gone Im gonna use the door. New phone, who dis? New York, NY, Ages 12-17: Camp Broadway Ensemble @ Carnegie Hall YES I DO! Barbara, this is our stuff BARBARA: A SHRINE TO THE FEELINGS WE'VE BEEN REPRESSING, BARBARA: UNFINISHED PROJECTS MEANINGLESS OBJECTS. Is that why youre wearing those sheets? I'm totally enchanted. BARBARA: Excuse me, this is all happening very fast, we just died and now youre here, and now theyre here and-. MAXIE DEAN: I was never gonna invest in your stupid "gated community." All I want is for someone, anyone to look my way and say Hey. "YES I DO! Theyre chasing me! Were going to live here! 'Otho Fenlock's Locked Door Ghosts' Probably committed suicide up there. And that makes me feel oh god, I actually feel! Shes a demon, and she doesnt get me. Rule number two: every new ghost gets a tote bag! From an outfit standpoint, her clothes launched the mood boards of many goth girls. YOU'RE ON THE RIGHT TRACK, GIRL I GOT YOUR BACK, GIRL I'M HELPING YOU GROW", TIME TO TAKE COMMAND YOU DICTATE THE HAND THE UNIVERSE DEALS. JUNO: YOU! CHARLES: LOOK AT ME! ** The ghost-with-the-most is coming to life on stage in this original musical based on Tim Burton's wonderfully demented film of the same . And so do I! Well, if you wanna treat me like a demon, then Ill be a demon. I got all the way to Howards store, and then Howard tells me their out of stock. BARBARA: There are two kinds of people in this world. Use their user talk pages. Barbara! I hid it in case that dancing football player caught me. Just like, what if Im never happy again? Except, this one year we tried to do a classic horror theme. LYDIA: Dad, how long do we have to stay here? NO! Lydia, you are so weird. My first name is Lawrence. Life is a goddamn roller coaster, I dont know how you people do that. IN THE WORLD, BE PREPARED TO TAKE YOUR EGGS AND FREEZE 'EM , DELIA: 'CAUSE EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING HAPPENS, LYDIA: SOUNDS LIKE TERRIBLE THINGS CAN HAPPEN. The two of you need to hire me right now. Im bringing my mom back! Whatd you do!? Its-. CHARLES: Except brains. Thats why youre here. BARBARA: Adam! I'm sure Dad will ruin it. Shes impossible. BARBARA: Yeah! Stupid sheet!, (Ad lib.). (laughs) Hell do it. Oh, Adam, were just getting started! I'm on the bench, but Coach. Scouts honor, but that books got a lot of dangerous stuff in it. LYDIA: Recently Deceased. (a beat.) But hey. Now, we dont have a lot of time. CHARLES: Wouldnt even know where to start. The main Characters of Beetlejuice: The Musical appear in a room and are given the chance to watch a musical all about themselves ~ I own nothing ~ Completed . You give mea bonerhere, its a femur. Its less. GIRL SCOUT: Okay Well- Maybe I should come back another time when your parents are home? Lydia: No! Thats why Im doing this. Mom! CENSUS AGENT: Hello, I'm with the U.S. Census Bureau, got time for a few, OH MY GOD! Charles! It was all rundown and we didnt know if we were going to get through it. I'm on the bench, but coach. BARBARA: Wait, what? JUNO: STOP! And we should tell her that! DELIA: Lydia, we talked about this sad, saddy, sadness stuff, yeah? Hes here! Eddie Perfect, Lydia is a dark, yet exceedingly smart young woman. DELIA: Oh! There's lots of cool stuff in there! Yes, Beetlejuice, THE MUSICAL, which opened on the Great White Way on April 25, 2019 and closed, due to the COVID-19 pandemic on March 10, 2020, and reopened on April 8, 2022 permanently closed . I never said-, LYDIA: You never say ANYTHING! But you wanted your mommy. LYDIA: Let me get you some cash for those cookies! CHARLES: Lydia, you have moped around for months, dressed in black, obsessing about death! But hes my monster. Not answering! BEETLEJUICE: No. You asked me, I'm answering. Thats why Ive been trying so hard to build a new one. You go to the Netherworld, you dont come back. Maybe the most haunting thing about "Beetlejuice," the new musical version of the 1988 Tim Burton movie that is having its world premiere at the National Theatre, is the creepy feeling of . LYDIA: Im gonna use it to bring my mom back from the Netherworld. LYDIA: What? Having lost her. Well, Bye! She scratches that out. (referring to DELIA.) Now, we have two days to transform this old house into the flagship model home of my new gated community. Dont, DONT text me in the middle of the night saying U up? because guess what? Every success begins with sucks and ends with yes. (Smokes.) Those people just died, and you guys are clapping! Ive got a way to make everyone see me. ADAM: Kill?!??!? Now rise, and be released from death! It says, Im warm, Im friendly, and I think about death only a normal amount! BEETLEJUICE: Fine! BARBARA: You were right. What an effervescent young lady you are. CHARLES: Good! So this is what you get! Beetlejuice: please don't make me beg *kneels* fine im begging okay i'm so sick and tired of being. Your moms dead, shes in the Netherworld. DELIA: Charles! It has to stop. BEETLEJUICE: Spoiler Alert: shes never going to eat that sandwich! DELIA: Charles, maybe we should just tell her about us. The man next to me And nothing else exists. Is this it? Again. CHARLES: Sweet Jesus, Delia we need a real exorcist! Yeah. These are the biggest changes that . BEETLEJUICE: Oh yeah. Wow, are those birds? DELIA: Youre breaking up with me AND firing me? CHARLES: Delia! And choosing the people you wanna share it with! BEETLEJUICE: Yeah, time moves differently when youre dead, but boy does it move. Well actually it was just this really hot apartment in Queens, where the doors locked from the outside. Beetlejuice (v.o) (laughs to himself) you are a naughty man. You both get em. Look at you. Heres help, heres you. ADAM: Oh yeah? Whos there? Make My Millennium!". It's from the store! However, there was no reasoning with the spirit, but Adam and Barbara had a slight advantage in the fact that they weren't stuck in Adam's miniature town. Monologues are presented on StageAgent for educational purposes only. BEETLEJUICE: Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes, please say yes. Okay, I see what you did there. Id like to meet my fianc, Delia. SPIN! (in a southern accent.) See? (a beat.) LYDIA: But were moving forward!, right? Im ready for some people to die. CHARLES: Hey! BEETLEJUICE: We are gonna make such a great team! Promise me we can talk about her. A ballad already? 4) "JAG" 18) The film "Beetlejuice" ended with Lydia dancing to what song? LYDIA: I have been alone since my mom died! I am utterly alone. And he's to blame. (snaps photo.) Oh my god! So lets scare my dad! ADAM: Well that wasnt very nice. Lydia: i can't change anything. BEETLEJUICE: WHY GOD-SLASH-SATAN, DID YOU SEND THESE BED WETTERS? IS MORE THAN JUST SPACE WITH NO END LA-LA-LA-LA-LA! Oh God, how I missed that sound. See ya suckers! LYDIA: Handbook For The Recently Deceased? And Ill admit. Its a classic Victorian with the original crown molding. Maybe nothing has to change. Lydia: I am alone. BARBARA: Lydia, no, you don't know what will happen. In Michael McDowell's script, the adorable Maitlands' death scene is quite graphic and traumatic they get trapped in a car and scream to no avail as they're shown slowly drowning. L: I'm Lydia Deetz and I'm of sound mind. The show opened in April 2019 at the Winter Garden Theatre but, just under a year later, the pandemic shuttered it prematurely. Beetlejuice tells the story of Lydia Deetz, a strange and unusual teenager obsessed with the whole "being dead thing." Lucky for Lydia, her new house is haunted by a recently deceased couple and Beetlejuice, a delightful demon with a real zest for life. Now, go on girl, get out of here, you know youre free, go on, get out of here. We have a dinner to plan, a house to redecorate-. Do you understand what Im proposing? LYDIA YOU GIVE ME THAT! I orbit. Start reading. (closes door.) I like to think I put my own spin on it, but whats the point, you know? I mean, no I have an idea, how about instead of impaling yourself on that birdbath, you uh, I dont know, say my name three times. Oldest trick in the book! LYDIA: Dad! Complimentary and Deeply Discounted Shows. BARBARA: And Lydia, she cant live like this! Pigs cant climb! NEVER MIND, HE'LL BE YOUR G-U-I-D-E TO THE OTHER SIDE, I'M THE B-TO-THE-DOUBLE-E-T-L-E TO THE J-U-I-C-E, BEETLEJUICE: I understand it's a lot to process, but, THE GOOD NEWS IS YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE DIED IN YOUR OWN HOUSE, THAT MEANS THE TWO OF YOU SHOULD STICK AROUND, A LITTLE ON THE POTTERY BARN AND DRY WHITE WINE SIDE, AS FOR ME, I'VE BEEN SCARING FOR MILLENNIA, I'M THE BIO-EXORCIST GIVING HOUSES ENEMAS, BEETLEJUICE AND ENSEMBLE: PUSH OUT ALL THE BREATHERS, BEETLEJUICE: AND I DO IT FOR THE LOVE OF IT, 'CAUSE THIS GUY HAPPENED TO BE PASSING BY, TO GIVE YOU CONTROL OF YOUR SOUL FOR THE WHOLE "BEING DEAD" THING (AH AH AH AH AH AH AH! ADAM: Lydia, we're so sorry! (MOVERS move in furniture.) BEETLEJUICE: Why do you gotta be so hard on me, Mom? She needs stability. Based on his/her attributes, we recommend you consider these audition pieces! NEIGHBOR: Hello?! Does this dress say Mindfulness?. Betelgeuse , Beetlejuice. BEETLEJUICE: Hi! We will just have to do this without her. DELIA: Oh, shes so stubborn, I just need more time. what Im trying to say is; I hired you to help my daughter, but you have ended up helping me. Suggested Audition Pieces Auditioning for Lydia? Proceed directly to the Netherworld! Maxie Dean will be here for dinner in two days. LYDIA: Hey Delia! The Maitlands and Beetlejuice, Lydia thinks, can bring her to the netherworld to see her mother once more. CHARLES: Oh yes, Lydia, she uh, Im afraid she wont be joining us. ~ You had met Lydia Deetz online on social media, and found out that she was moving into your town. 24m. I had it open for a second but the Maitlands slammed it shut. Love is love. ADAM: That guy! The production is scheduled to close on June 6 . Thats what I want too. BEETLEJUICE: Okay, plan B! Whats a matter Chuck? My dad never wants me to talk about her. I realized that I dont want to go through life alone. Check it out, Lydia! Its about love! (ADAM and BARBARA scream as BARBARAs hand is on fire.). And you heard what he said, any ghost can do that possession stuff. I was in a sweat lodge. Source: www.enca.com. Beebleboose! Yes book? Mr. Join the StageAgent community MONSTER BEETLEJUICE: We come for your daughter, Chuck! Its the one room in the house thats still ours! TELL MY STORYYYYYY! LYDIA: Dad! And the teacher was Wiccan! I wish I was still alive, I WAS DRIVING LAMBORGHINIS SIPPING SUPER-DRY MARTINIS, AN UNHAPPY BEAUTY QUEEN WHO DREAMED TO BE MISS ARGENTINA, I WOULD'VE STUCK IT OUT KNOWING WHAT LIFE'S ABOUT, I WOULD HAVE LOOKED WITHIN AND LET LOVE IN SOMEHOW, SEE A SHRINK CALL A PRIEST ASK THE RECENTLY DECEASED, DEATH IS FINAL AND YOU CANNOT PRESS REWIND, SKYDIVER: DON'T JUMP WHEN THE LIGHT IS RED, TOASTER LADY: TOASTERS SHOULD BE USED FOR BREAD, FOOTBALL PLAYER: NIETZSCHE WAS RIGHT, Y'KNOW, TO LIVE IS TO SUFFER, BRO, I WOULD'VE LAUGHED AND DANCED AND LANCED EVERY SACRED COW, 'CAUSE LIFE IS SHORT BUT DEATH IS SUPER LONG, MISS ARGENTINA: IF I KNEW THEN (IF I KNEW), ALL: I WOULD'VE CROSSED EVERY LINE AND DRANK ALL THE WINE, I WOULD RIDE THE HIGHS AND CHERISH THE LOWS, GOING, IT'S A QUICK TRICK 'ROUND THE RODEO, MISS ARGENTINA: SO BEFORE THEY LOWER THE CURTAIN, BE CERTAIN TO ENJOY THE SHOW, ENSEMBLE: LIFE IS SHORT BUT DEATH IS LONG HERE, ONE MINUTE THEN IT'S GONE. Move forward. Anthony King Chuck, I never leave home without them (he and MAXINE erupt into laughter.) And you dont exist. Just a bunch of Howards and then you die. Beetlejuice is a musical with music and lyrics by Eddie Perfect and book by Scott Brown and Anthony King. WE'RE MORE THAN DETRITUS WE'RE FINALLY ALIVE! Powerless. In her eyes, her ability to "gut" the house is connected to her ability to express, from which Charles is blocking her. "Beetlejuice" is closing on Broadway in January, ending its unconventional, fan-fueled run on the Great White Way. MAITLANDS: BJ IS A GRADUATE OF JUILLIARD! DELIA: Why thank you, future step-daughter. CHARLES: -Not good for Lydia. Beetlejuice- wedding scene by beetlejuice - Karaoke Lyrics on Smule. I wanna go home. Hi there. BEETLEJUICE: DID I SAY NETHERWORLD? Barbara, its like one of our classes! AND I DONT KNOW HOW TO PROCESS MY ANGER BECAUSE AS A SOCIETY WE DONT TEACH MEN HOW TO PROCESS THEIR ANGER, SO MAYBE ILL JUST TRYMURDER! BEETLEJUICE: WOO! THE THREE OF US ALONE CAN WRECK DAD'S EVENING, YEAH, I GOT GAME! So goodbye . invisible nd you can change all of that. Delilah BEETLEJUICE: We didnt hang out much, Charles! BARBARA Oh, honey. (chuckling.) You old swaddler! A few nights before she- before the end, Emily took my hand and said, I know you wanna fix it. OTHO: Delia? Seeking 2 Actor Team for Spring That was a disaster. Welcome! Because of her, I got to live, briefly, very briefly, and can I just say something? CHARLES: And, she wanted my blessing. Fine, you wanna be together? But heres the good news! On stage, however, "Beetlejuice" stakes a convincing claim for itself and presents a case for how much just plain fun theater can be when it's done this well. BEETLEJUICE: Its a figure of speech Adam, okay? But I swear to you, we will. This. Now, lets get you processed. ADAM: Im sorry, I have to say it, this house is not stupid. Lydia, this is a dangerously unstable individual. Theres very good energy in here. And yet, I worry. Delia, that was just the wind. Say Chuck, didnt you used to have a daughter? Sign up today to unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. It sayswe should draw a door. Call 9-1-1! Upgrade to PRO Sign Up for PRO to view suggested audition pieces! You dont like your dad, and I dont like my mom! YEAH! I mean, not this, I dont think anyone could have predicted this. LYDIA: WAY BACK WHEN I WAS JUST TEN SIMPLE AND SWEET, EVERYWHERE, FELLAS WOULD STARE OUT ON THE STREET, LYDIA: NOW ONE OF 'EM LOVES ME, WANTS TO BE MINE, LYDIA: MY CREEPY OLD GUY, MY CREEPY OLD GUY, BARBARA/DELIA: GIRLS MAY SEEM DISGUSTED, BUT WE'RE ACTUALLY JUST SHY, BEETLEJUICE: I AM OLDER, BUT I'M GLAD I WAITED, ALL: CREEPY OLD GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY. ITS ALMOST A GIVEN THAT I WILL ALL SOON BE ALIVE. It's just like you said, you dont always get it, but youre a part of it. DELIA: (Ringing Triangle.) After everything Ive done for her. As your guru Otho always said, this is taking too long! Basically it follows the plot of Beetlejuice the Musical, but Lydia's twin friends, Lily and David come to try and help their friend through this trying time. CHARLES: No, shes still too fragile. The late '80s cartoon of the same name makes Beetlejuice and Lydia best friends, not maybe-lovers, and the Broadway musical made a big effort to modernize the story: It does keep the "I'm . ADAM: What the heck did they do to our house? (laughs.). Happiness! You ripe old bastard. OTHO: Delia! BEETLEJUICE: And I know that now. Youll have to open the door to find out. DELIA: Otho, I noticed that the Soulbox is both glowing and making a noise. Let me point you to the right page. YAAAH. Leave this house! Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." Based on the 1988 Burton film, this musical delves into the life of oddball teen Lydia Deetz, who meets a recently deceased couple and an unruly demon willing to help them haunt a house. Were still in our house, all our stuff is here! youre getting really comfy with the whole being dead thing! DELIA: I dont think thats how knock knock jokes work. ADAM: So, Lydia since you can see us, let me get right to the point. SEQUEL (air horn.) *Our system only provides suggested monologues or songs for select characters if we have matching monologues and song information in our database. BARBARA: But were invisible. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features Press Copyright Contact us Creators . SO WE MIGHT AS WELL WALK THROUGH SOME WALLS, 'CAUSE ADAM, WE'RE READY AS WE'LL EVER GET, I GOTTA GET RIGHT OUTSIDE MY COMFORT ZONE. (they scream.) BEETLEJUICE: Well make it snappy, I WANT CAKE! BEETLEJUICE: Well, yeah, because youre not recently deceased. Leave this house! Thank you for being here. LYDIA: Because, youre not scary. christian laettner first wife; leaf home water solutions vs culligan; conventions in las vegas 2022. sona jobarteh husband; houston crime rate by race Beetlejuice tickets will be available to purchase soon. (giggle) Just kidding! We were told living people ignore the strange and unusual. Lydia doesnt have my resilience. Why would anyone wanna spend more time with their mother? Im gonna teach you guys how to be ghosts! Now heres the problem. ADAM: Yeah. : 1) Lollapalooza -- Created in 1991 as a farewell tour for Perry Farrell's band, it ran annually until 1997, and was revived in 2003. LYDIA: Yeah, you said Stop acting so weird, I need this job., DELIA: No! ADAM: Well, why do we have to make them say it? Our whole life is in that house. (an idea.) Could I bring her back here? The Tony-nominated smash Beetlejuice played its final performance on March 11 at the Winter Garden Theatre. Lets get that book open. Fool your friends! MAXIE DEAN: Im rich. Im gonna need some help! Its finally time for you two to go to the Netherworld! CHARLES: On behalf of Delia and myself, I'd just like to say, ALL (but LYDIA): DAYLIGHT COME AND ME WANNA GO HOME. BEETLEJUICE: Well then what am I supposed to do! We did kill someone though. I know, theres still so much I wanted to do. CHARLES: Lydia! Oh, speaking of luggage, have you met my fourth wife? And Im not gonna let you take it from her! Weve already said it a bunch of times! If you would like to give a public . And breathers worry so much about their stupid little lives, most of them never notice anything strange or unusual unless you make them. Rule number 1: Dont leave the house. LYDIA: We gotta get out of here! ADAM: Woah. So, take a breath, metaphorically, and just remember. I am utterly alone." -Lydia Deetz. Dont you remember when we moved in? Just put me in the game. Im the perfect person to help you battle your ghost. But the two of you can. BEETLEJUICE: Whaaaat? CHARLES: Delia, you erotic astronaut! Sorry! ADAM: The electoral college! Feel nothing. DELIA: Charles, that was the most spiritually nourishing rogering you have ever given me. OTHO: Thats the one. BEETLEJUICE: Pepperoni, mushrooms and snakes! We do not have time to make screaming, passionate, love right now. Theres a Toblerone, a bath bomb, a book youre never going to read. And if not, we're adding more every week so if you don't see one you like, keep checking back! (softly.) I study death, I think like death, I spent a long holiday weekend in a Red Roof Inn with death! One minute youre on top of the world, and the next minute, you feel like no one will ever love you This guy knows what Im talking about! Ill do it. LYDIA: Wow, this is going to be such an interesting night! ADAM: I know, I know, me too. Oh my god! Can everybody see me? BEETLEJUICE: Ugh, holy moly, a lot of people come to this house, lights! BEETLEJUICE: Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! Who knows what hes done to Lydia! Mom!! Beetlejuice - Musical. It is based on the 1988 film of the same name, directed by Tim Burton with story by Michael McDowell and Larry Wilson, about a deceased couple who try to haunt the new inhabitants of their former home and call help from a devious bio-exorcist ghost named Betelgeuse (pronounced . We used to make the haunted houses in the garage, but, in the summer so no one expected it. I want you to get Beetlejuice out of the picture!". **Beetlejuice: The Musical has ended its Broadway run, but is currently touring nationally. The rule bookI present: The Handbook for The Recently Deceased. Were not like you! ADAM: CHEFS WHO USE TOO MUCH SAGE WHEN THEY MAKE BEURRE NOISETTE, BEETLEJUICE: WELL, THERE'S LOTS THERE TO USE, TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND GIVE ME YOUR BEST PRIMAL SCREAM, BEETLEJUICE: TRY IT AGAIN MAYBE THIS TIME PRETEND LIKE YOU MEAN IT. BEETLEJUICE: I am not Wiccan, and that is nothing like this. People dont read. This . All ganging up against the mean lady from hell! Hope I didnt scare you (screams) ARITHMIA 1234. BEETLEJUICE: Get in there Babs! BARBARA: WE'LL RATTLE CHAINS AND I DON'T KNOW! (a beat.) LYDIA: What are you talking about? You are dead? MAXIE DEAN: Oh, dont mind her. BEETLEJUICE: Oh yeah? Very good energy. Demon's Dance. Synopsis: Beetlejuice, a malevolent spirit masquerading as a guide to the Netherworld meets the Maitlands, a recently deceased couple learning the ropes of haunting their own home. A fall from that height? Well, we can take care of that. They become caught up in the supernatural elements and try to get Lydia to realize what she really needs the most. DELIA: Lydia, I know that I am paid to care about you, but Id like us to be real friends! We want to help you! But what if it doesnt last? I cancelled the exorcist, and Ive hired someone better. MISS ARGENTINA: Oh, but you have to go back now. Adam, youre boring. Theyre made out of the devil! I'M GONNA MAKE HIM SAY MY NAME, I'LL MAKE HIM SAY MY NAME (MAKE HIM SAY YOUR NAME). ADAM: What other choice do we have? But, if youre going to live like a ghost, you have to follow the rules. JUNO: You are the embarrassment. ADAM: My whole life flashed before my eyes! Every bit of it. Beetlejuice Wiki is a FANDOM Movies Community. February 27, 2020 7:07pm. LYDIA: Hey Beetlejuice! AND Im from New Jersey! (THE MAITLANDS nod.) Living girl! Lady, you're forgetting something! (a beat.) My baby's got a body that doesnt quit and a brain that doesnt work! By the time you read this note. No one likes it, throw it out.. DELIA: What are you talking about? I didnt like strangers when I was alive. Eh, it was worth a shot. BEETLEJUICE: Its my middle name. BARBARA: No offense mister, but you give me the creeps. I FOUND MY FREQUENCY CRYSTALS SPEAK TO ME, EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON, THERE ARE SPIRITUAL GUIDES ABOVE LOOK UP AND SEE 'EM, JUST LISTEN TO THE MELODY THE UNIVERSE SINGS, 'CAUSE EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON, THE UNIVERSE IS JUST THE CONTENTS OF TIME, MATTER AND SPACE, LYDIA: NINETY-ONE BILLION LIGHT-YEARS ACROSS AND THE EARTH'S A SMALL PLACE, THE PACIFIC ISLANDS ARE SINKING BUT NEGATIVE THINKING IS HARDLY THE CAUSE, YOU THINK LIFE IS ALL UNICORNS AND RAINBOWS 'CAUSE YOU'RE BORED, LYDIA: AND POSITIVITY IS A LUXURY THAT FEW CAN AFFORD, DELIA: NO NO NO! ADAM: Im confused, you can see us without the sheets. ADAM: Again, we do not want to kill anyone! Yes, I love that man of mine. AGHHHH! Go back to New York! Maybe, we can help each other! You know, socially liberal, but fiscally conservative. If this house is haunted, then that means mom might still be back at our old house!